Sometimes, I’m okay with not having friends in real life. It happens, that’s part of being an adult.
But sometimes, it just really hurts to see or hear people talking about doing things with friends, because I don’t have that. Despite my best efforts, I don’t have any friends in real life, and sometimes it makes me feel pathetic.
“I care for myself. The more solitary, the more friendless, the more unsustained I am, the more I will respect myself.”— Charlotte Bronte, Jane Eyre
Below the belt
Words spoken in anger
Allude to what we really feel
When the storm passes we’ll say “I didn’t mean it”
But words aren’t something you can repeal.
Once something is said,
It’s out there; and you can’t take it back;
At least now I know where I stand,
And I’ve never felt more attacked.
I’ve always been there for you
Even when you didn’t deserve it
You’d flake on me when I needed you
And took my forgiveness for granted.
You never even apologized
For half the messed up things you did
And normally I’d let it slide,
But this time you really stepped in it.
You hit below the belt
And mocked my depression,
Threw my family issues in my face
Because of my alleged transgression.
Now I’m left wounded
But the sting of your words.
Crying my eyes out
Until my vision blurs.
I’m hoping this goodbye was our last.
You’ll never hurt me like this again
We won’t repeat our past.
Need friends.
Accepting applications now.
I can pay you one dollar. 🤷🏻♀️🤷🏻♀️
I need friends. Can we be friends?
Please.
Friends?
Anyone want to talk? Ya girl is lonely.
The amount of effort I put into relationships does not equal the amount of effort I put into relationships. When will I stop being so naive?
Loneliness is worse than poverty. Because you can be poor and not lonely. But if you have money and you’re lonely, it’s still agonizing. It just means that you can suffer while you’re by yourself watching a ballet in the opera house. I’m starting to rank loneliness as one of the worst and most unhealthy things a person can experience. And I go through it often. I define loneliness as not having any intimate relationships or emotionally fulfilling interactions with people, and not having anyone to talk to about the things that matter to you.
“You say: ‘Never before have I felt so much love and never before so alone.’ Those are two aspects of the same coin. And you say: ‘Thank you, Osho.’ You have understood it. I am happy that you have been able to see the connection between love and aloneness. Enjoy both. Never choose one out of the two, because if you choose one both will die. Allow both to happen. When aloneness happens, move into it; when love happens, move into it. Aloneness means moving in, love means moving out. Aloneness is the breath going in, love is the breath going out. And if you stop one, you will die. You cannot hold the breath in; you cannot hold the breath out. Breathing is a total process, and in the total process the in-coming breath is as much essential as the out-going breath. Love is the out-going breath, aloneness is the in-coming breath. And that’s how your soul lives; that’s how you become soulful. Allow both. Never choose! Choicelessly allow both. And go with wherever the breath is going. Aloneness is interiority, love is exteriority. Carl Gustav Jung has made these words very famous. He divided people basically into two types: the introverts and the extraverts. That is a wrong division. People cannot be categorized that way. People cannot be pigeon-holed this way. I have never come across anyone who is just introvert—he will die immediately, because he will have only the in-breath. And I have never come across a person who is just extravert—he will die too. People are both. It is possible that one is more of an extravert than an introvert, and vice versa. And that’s what brings imbalance to your personality. One should be both simultaneously. One should be balanced. My sannyasins have to be extravert introverts, introvert extraverts—both together. This is one of the most important things to be understood, because in the past the monks have tried to be just introverts. They were called the other-worldly people, the people who renounce the world and move into the monasteries and the mountains and the deserts. They decided that only to be an introvert is the right way to connect with God—as if God is not without, but only within. And the other, the worldly person, has remained extravert. He thinks he has nothing to do with introversion, meditation, prayer. His interest is in money, power, prestige, people, crowds—the world. He never looks in. This is a very schizophrenic arrangement. I would like my sannyasins not to be schizophrenic but whole. Be in the world and yet be not of it. Move between the outside and the inside, and let the movement become as smooth as possible, as simple as possible. Just as you come out of your house into the garden: it is too cold inside, you come out. It is too sunny outside; soon you start feeling hot, soon you start perspiring, and you move in—into the house, into the coolness and the shade of the house. Just as you move inside the house and outside the house, go on moving in and out—both are yours. The old sannyasins, the old monks, claimed only the inner, they denied the outer. My message is: Nothing has to be denied—the whole belongs to you. I give you the whole universe, the inner and the outer both. I would not like you to become introverts, because those who are introverts against extraversion become ill, pathological, dormant, stagnant, closed, disconnected, uprooted. They start living a windowless existence. They start living in unnecessary misery. They never come to know what aloneness is, because aloneness cannot be known without love—they only know loneliness. And loneliness is not health; loneliness is illness. And the people who live only in the outside world and never think of the inner, they are on the other extreme. They know something of love, but their love is never more than lust—because love cannot happen unless aloneness has also happened in you. Their love is a beautiful name for lust. They need the other, they exploit the other, they possess the other. And when you possess the other, the other possesses you. People become slaves, and people are reduced to things. People are no more people. The person who lives only on the outside, without knowing his inside, is poor, very poor—unaware of his inner treasures. And the person who lives only in the inside is also poor, because he never becomes aware of the beauty of existence, of the stars, of the sands and the sun, of the trees and the birds. The inner and the outer are not two. The inner is the inner of the outer, and the outer is the outer of the inner. My sannyasin has to be both together. I would like to create a new man whom Carl Gustav Jung cannot categorize, whom he cannot call extravert or introvert, for whom he will have to find a new word—because he will be whole, he will be both. He will be as much in his body as in his soul; he will be a materialist as much as a spiritualist. He will be of this world as much as of that, and he will have no division in his mind, and no choice.”— Osho (The Fish in the Sea is Not Thirsty)
If you don’t reach out to people they probable ,won’t reach out to you either.This is why shy people tend to be alone and not because they enjoy loneliness.